Installing a New Front Door
Have you ever felt like you were a
magnet for trouble?
or weirdo's? Well let me let give you a
glimpse into my world and comical experience when I wanted a new front
door.
Sometimes, I just feel like I have huge
weirdo magnet, on my butt!
It's like a giant kick me sign, that
materializes for an unspecified amount of time...
5 minutes, an hour...
and I know
never when it's going to appear.
Like the time I went to Walmart and had
a 200 year old man with one leg in a rusted wheelchair tell me that I had a nice
caboose....(and no, I wasn't holding a train at the time) Who then proceeded to
try and follow me around the store, whispering sweet nothings at my "caboose".
All I wanted was one pack of socks, find a pack of white socks and get in and
get out.
I almost resorted to running to the
hunting section, applying black grease paint to my face and doing some kind of
Covert Op Maneuver in the garden section just to get away from this horn
dog.
See what I mean? Weirdo magnet!
Well this next one ends good, lengthy
but good
All I wanted was a new front door.
By the way bestie friend Lisa, it's
not going to do you any good to reject my shipment of this weirdo magnet. I
paid them to throw it on your doorstep and run like hell, it's your turn to
hold the damn thing!
This is my front door and screen
door...
Taaa Daaa Ewwww
It's ok, you can say it. I did.
Ewww.
Now, fast forward 2 weeks of Internet
and Pinterest research. Of me, delicately preparing the hubster of my devious
plot to blow some cash on something that still opens, closes and keeps the evil
elements outside from getting inside. Replacing it for no other reason then when
you look at it, you say.
Eewww.
So, I measured, decided on a look, then
went shopping. Simple right? Well not when you factor in I have a weirdo magnet
on my butt. All I want is to have molding around the outside of my new door
framing it, that currently does not exist.
This is what I have
No molding, no details, just really old
& ugly doors. Below is a pic of my inside door jamb.
The depth of my door jamb is 9-1/2" from
outside edge of the drywall to the outside edge of the brick. Most door's
including the jamb, is about 5" deep. So off I went to the big box stores to
look at "Jamb extensions" to get educated, or should I say "ed-u-ma-cated" as
hubby puts it.
So I find a nice man (snort) and ask him
if he could show me a Jamb extension, because I'm curious about them. He asks
me what size door I need, I say it's a standard 36" wide door, but it's a brick
ranch so the depth of the whole door jam is 9-1/2" with a limestone sill and I'd
like to look at a jamb extension.
He walks me over the door aisles and
proceeds to tell me that he doesn't care about the depth measurement but he
needs the casing to casing measurement.
I repeat my original statement, 36
inches (and I start to feel a sudden urge to remove something from my caboose)
Uhh Ohhh
Him: Casing to casing?
Me: Yes, casing to casing is 36" wide
and the door itself, measures 35-5/8"
(in creeps the weirdo magnet)
Him: I think you might be mis-measuring,
because I don't know why you would want a jamb extension?
Me: ok, ummm <deep relaxing
breath, because repeating myself twice, just sucks> I have a brick ranch
home and want the outside edge (pointing to exactly what I'm talking about) of
this casing, to be on the outside edge of the brick like a picture frame
molding...and THAT measurement is 9-1/2 inches deep. I would like to SEE a jamb
extension, to see how THEY work, so I can find out if I NEED ONE in order to get
the look I want. Do you have any jamb extensions?
Him: When was your home built?
Me: 1965, why?
Him: I'm wondering why you feel you need
a jamb extension? Did they do something really weird with your house when they
installed the door or if it was even installed properly at all....
Me: I want the outside edge of the
casing flush with the outside edge of the brick...that's why I'd like to SEE a
jamb extension, or find how THEY work?? Jamb extensions, are they down this
aisle? <smile>
Him: Yeah but no one ever needs a jamb
extension, all I care about is the casing to casing measurement, that's it. So
why don't you....are you married? Why don't you have your husband measure from
here to here (patiently showing me exactly where I should measure because he is
ohh so clever) and BRING me THAT measurement and I'll be happy to sell you
ANY door you want.
Me: I've given it to you, remember? I
said <I took a deeeeeeep breath resisting the urge to grab the
weirdo magnet and hit him with it!> 36" from INSIDE casing to casing. But
lets stop for a second. Your first sentence was "No one needs a jamb
extension", right?
Him: Right
Me: Ok, excluding my brick, just
forget about it
and please answer my question
the jamb measurement
(reading my notes) depth wise, is 7-1/2" wide. THIS door jamb RIGHT HERE is
NOT, its about 5", so how do I extend it?
Him: Ma'am, they must have done
something different with your door, but if you could get us the casing to casing
measurement, it will fit.
Me: Soooo, you're still telling me to
bring back a measurement?
(At this point, there is another couple
approximately in their forties, watching, listening...and even the husband looks
at this sales person with mild irritation)
Him: <Beaming smile>
Absolutely, I want to make sure your door fits.
Me: ok, uhhh <huge frustrated
sigh now> Ummm, in the time it took me to park my car at the farthest
point in your parking lot, walk the 3 miles inside this huge 2 story home
improvement store to the escalator and then walk back another 3 miles to the
door section, I think you could have gotten some form of training that says when
a customer says Jamb extensions, she wants to see a jamb extension. Sooooo,
instead of making the 6 mile walk BACK to my car, the 7 mile drive BACK to my
house...why don't I do a Seance and bring BACK Flo from Mel's Diner! Because
THAT'S the only thing I'll bringing back here for YOU. Maybe you will hear that,
even tho I've said Jamb extensions now several times!
Him: What?
Me: Do you remember Flo, from Mel's
Diner, played in the 1970's!?! She used to yell "Kiss My Grits" when she was
irritated (like me right now)?
Him: (shrug)
Me: Well, what I'm thinking YOU can
KISS isn't ladylike, so let me bring HER back! Jerk!
The on looking couple I told you
about, as I walked past to do my 3 mile jaunt back to my
car the husband whispers; "Home Depot sells Jamb extensions, try
there".
Thank you kind sir! at least someone
heard me.
Well, as it turns out (after getting
ed-u-ma-cated) I could use one, or we can work around it and the latter is
more cost effective and I won't have to replace my limestone sill at the
bottom. Whew! because that's what I was afraid of.
Thanks to hubby and Adam
(Handyman/Contractor) I bought all the supplies I needed, including pre-primed
wood trim to frame out my new freshly painted white steel door.
Now we can all start saying Taa
Daaa!
The hubster hates, despises and
absolutely loathes doing doors. He hates it so much, he didn't
even QUESTION, nor CARE about the installation cost.
Now that says how much he really didn't
want to DIY it.
And he was right too because let me tell
you, Adam just LOVED the fact that our Brick Ranch was built by a Carpenter who
had a fetish for 3 to 4 inch nails.
Everywhere
Pulling those long nails
out, sounds suspiciously like pulling a molar out of a screaming moose.
That poor guy!
Then he had to frame around the outside of the door with molding that we never had before. So you know what that means
you have to drill into brick, and put in anchors. Each hole in the
brick, took 20 minutes to drill with a hammer drill.
Totally worth it!
Adam hadn't caulked/filled the nail
holes yet but here are some closer looks, and the storm door hasn't been
installed yet.
Ironic isn't it that the new handle and
lock cost more then the door ? I found that ironic.
Here is the finished door, and the
weirdo magnet has disappeared, for now!
Shadow had to join in, the full lite
screen door when opened, is now her favorite spot to squirrel watch.
And since I didn't choose a
entry door that had glass, I changed up my entry with brighter items and am
moving the 3 wood/wrought iron gates to the Dining Room.
Just adding one coat on the pre-primed
door and trim....made it even brighter on my covered porch.
Well that's it for weirdo magnet episode
# 148 in my life.
Thanks for letting me share it.
XO,
Christine